it starts when i wonder what i'm doing with myself. then, i start to ponder existence generally. then soon, i realize there is no inherent meaning in existence generally, and whatever meaning we instill in things is just that, creations of my mind. suddenly, nothing matters anymore.
it is a fine line between being passively nihilistic and coming to terms with this emptiness of things.
it is precisely because nothing matters anymore, that the only thing that matters is my peace of mind, whichever way i get there.
