how does one go from a negative, despairing view to a positive, life-embracing one?
so perhaps, the logic leap is this: if nothing matters at all, the only thing that matters is how we feel. and personally, i prefer feeling nice to feeling bad.
if there's a way to feel good without making any effort in life, then, by all means (we might starve, but perhaps some of us don't mind). for most of us, we aren't quite wired that way. feeling good entails attempting things, achieving things, to get that sense that we're doing, we're fulfilling something. of course, we're mostly focusing on the fulfillment portion - when we fail, it's not really not so good. but if we never try, we're also stuck with the sense of regret. sometimes, it seems like a winless situation. at least, that's how my brain seems to have been wired. not that i wished it to be or not to be wired like this - it seems to just have happened that way.
so the paradox of doing our best and being non-attached will surely remain a paradox, but in a way it's a two-pronged approach to the issue of maintaining well-being. on one hand, being non-attached is the practice of feeling good without making any effort, and accepting things as they are. on the other, we know not trying really doesn't feel good either. so we have to try, and try really hard. before we fully realize the nature of success and failure, the non-attachment part starts to help dull the pain of failure.
so desireless action, is the ideal. non-action for the most part does not work, as the lack of fulfillment is so strong that it can easily start the cycle of hopelessness, overshadowing any progress made on the non-attachment front.
ultimately, when we realize there is joy in action itself, the emphasis we place on results lessen, until, one day, they don't matter much anymore.
