exploring some darker elements...
1. i can't be bothered, i have enough things on my to-do list. it simply is not a necessary or key part of my life. i'll get to it when i really have lots of time.
2. i hate being guilted into volunteering, i don't like to commit to things as other priorities may come up, or i simply don't feel like doing it that day.
3. if i do volunteer, i want to be the star volunteer. i want to be head of that volunteer organization. i would like everyone to look at what a great charitable philanthropic humanity loving person i am. i want to do things my way, not listen to some do-gooder who is impractical and has no business sense.
4. i don't mind helping, but i secretly don't like to deal with "those" people - the people who don't look, feel, smell as nice. i like to cuddle cute children, but not other than that.
5. i want to be the change that i wish to see, but is there an easier way to do this rather than this grueling tedious stuff? is there some way i can not do that much work but feel a lot of the impact?
6. i don't want to feel i'm piggy-backing someone else, i want to see myself as the driver of this change, to feel empowered that i am doing this myself.
7. my skills are in the high value kind of volunteer work, not selling low value raffle tickets. it's just not a good use of my time to try to get fifty bucks for an hour's work. and i don't know where to find this kind of high value volunteer work.
8. there are a million charities for a million different causes. i have no idea where to start and they all seem deserving of attention, and everywhere i look, is pain, and more pain. if i don't do anything, i'm insulated from this kind of thing and hence i can go on living my happy life.
9. i've volunteered some and most of the time people don't even like us, and they have little interest in being helped, and i feel like i'm bothering them more than anything else. the impact i make is truly so small (if any at all) it makes absolutely no difference in the big scheme of things.
10. being a successful businessman is the best kind of philanthropic work that i will do - creating jobs for people, driving the economy, bettering people's lives. that is the work i should be focusing on, not volunteering at random agencies where my impact is at best limited and at worst building up a culture of social welfare reliance.
probably need a response to these points soon...
