what do i want to be remembered by?

this is such a weird question for me now. the simple answer, now, is i really wouldn't care. i mean, ideally, at my eulogy, people would say more nice things than bad things (it seems like a reasonable thing to wish for), but the way things work, at these eulogies, people say nice things about the worst people anyway.

i'm trying to recall when i went from "i want to remembered as this great person" to "i'm dead, why would it make a difference?" to "ok, it would probably not be a bad thing if somehow people become happier/inspired/etc etc if i died". the last one does sound weird, but it's really is kind of the only thing that would remotely matter.

i suppose it's a bit of a continuum. the difficult part is realizing that, regardless of whether there's an afterlife or not, whether anyone remembers me, the way i should live my life should really be the same.