sustainable selflessness

how much do i sacrifice for my loved ones?

the word "sacrifice" in itself means there is something i'm giving up, possibly with no return. when i truly expect no return, then the word doesn't even mean anything anymore. well, not that i expect to get there this life time.

but it's still a relevant question.

to the extent that i can remain sane, as much as possible.

ideally, food, clothing, shelter, and rest are not worries. there's the old cliche that if i can't take care of myself, i can't take care of others. perhaps a slight modification is that if i ignore myself to take care of others, while noble, it helps them in the short term, but when i burnout and break down, i'm certainly not helping any one in the long term. so maybe there should a term called "sustainable selflessness".

like all things, it's a fine balance, learned through trial and error.

if there is one personal thing i need to do for myself, wake up that one hour earlier to do it. it will help keep me sane.

in any case, the less ego and attachment i have in the first place, the less the consequences matter. "how much is enough" is no longer a question, it just becomes something that happens.