seven questions

assuming for a moment, that at some point in future, i have no immediate concerns for food and accommodation...

what truly matters?

am i seeking the knowledge to find out what truly matters?

have i gone through my own vetting process, pushing my own arguments to the limits, to see if i can be convinced if these things matter? (and to stop myself from looping into an existential abyss)

so, am i doing something that matters?

practically speaking, is this sustainable at the moment?

if it's possibly not, what am i doing to improve its odds?

if i am doing something that matters, am i ensuring that my ego does not get in the way?

three easy steps

courtesy of "the insubordinate", the three easy steps to remember:

- do endless research

- push yourself to do plenty of analysis

- have the courage of your convictions to actually make it happen

after the match

any result is such a random confluence of effort, circumstance, and chance.

winning or losing is the most important thing during the match; how we conduct ourselves afterwards is the most important thing in life?

urgent vs important

it is kind of hard to remember what the important things are, over the great noise of urgent things.

of course, not every single minute of our lives can be devoted to doing the things that we deem as important.

but, certainly, we spend a heck of a lot of time doing things that are urgent.

the first step, might be to spend a little time contemplating what things are important, that might not be so urgent, until it's too late.

course of action

reflect. plan. reflect again. do.

and, try to maximize the effort, and minimize the expectation.

paralysis of choice

i'm particularly bad at this. really, quite bad.

some things to remind myself.

- it is impossible to make everyone happy

- it is extremely unlikely to pick the absolute best decision (or to pick the worst one)

- all the facts are not going to be available, so it is a toss of the dice

- whatever the choice is, try to think of the larger consequences of people other than yourself

potential train wrecks

the temptation to not be good anymore is sometimes pretty large. there's the spur-of-the-moment desire for that immediate satisfaction, and there's the more well thought out i-could-get-away-with-this type.

the actions are always well justified, and everything else, the big picture, careers, reputation, family, all fade into the background.

we've all seen abundant examples of really smart people doing really stupid things.

some of them are blinded by their own successes and hold themselves to a different moral standard, using some form of justification along the lines of i-deserve-this. others simply can't beat it back and go in fully assuming they could well one day really eat shit and be throughly destroyed. yet, they appear to be powerless to stop themselves, even in the face of an impending train wreck.

and they say, if you haven't been there, you just don't know how it's like.

does everyone get their own potential train wrecks, just in different forms?

are we, whether as individuals, or a community, or a society, already are on some trains crossing some shaky bridges, and we just think we're going to be fine? until that one time it isn't?

i will never

i will never be a world class athlete.

i will never blog like seth godin.

i will never practice and teach yoga like dharma mittra.

i will never be the modern day don juan.

i will never make so much money that i no longer have to worry.

right, that much is obvious.

the usual responses are: i) focus on the possible, not the impossible; or ii) if you say you never can, then you never will. so aim high; or iii) if you aspire to be someone else, you will never find your own destiny; or iv) it's the process, not the goal; or v) perhaps you have already in your past life, or you will in your future life.

ok, two things.

- think in a five year time scale. there are lots of things that i will never do, but in five years, there are probably some things i will be able to do that i previously thought were impossible.

- there are things other people are never able to do, the things i do and take for granted every day. seriously.

six levels

i like roadmaps. to see where i possibly might go. i have a general feel for the destination, but the interim stops are every bit as important - a single-minded focus on the end is simply the wrong path to take sometimes. everyone's definition is going to be different, so here's a stab at it.

level 1: helping the old lady cross the street, casual monetary donations.

level 2: casual vegetarian. exploring altruism, moral progress, realizing there may be a way of life other than a pure pursuit of self-interest. being helpful to people even though it may cause me trouble.

level 3: weekday vegetarian. regular voluntary work. regular sharing of findings. come to terms with more money really doesn't matter. helping people with truly no expectation of return favors.

level 4: vegetarian. at least 50% of time is doing things that have a more direct benefit on others.

level 5: vegan. working in non-profit, majority of life dedicated to non-self interest issues.

level 6: true selflessness. devotion to mankind. everything i have is yours.

so is this going to make me feel better? or one day on the path, i will think, all of this pain and goody goody doing for naught? i get nothing in return, and the world hasn't changed an inch?